The World's Greatest Criminal Mind
"The World's Greatest Criminal Mind" is a song from The Great Mouse Detective, sung by Professor Ratigan and his henchmice. Lyrics Ratigan: "My friends, we are about to embark on the most odious, the most evil, the most diabolical scheme of my illustrious career. A crime to top all crimes, a crime that will live in infamy! Tomorrow evening, our beloved monarch celebrates her diamond jubilee. And, with the enthusiastic help of our good friend Mr Flaversham, it promises to be a night she will never forget. Her last night, and my first, as Supreme Ruler of all Mousedom!" From the brain that brought you the Big Ben Caper The head that made headlines in every newspaper And wondrous things like the Tower Bridge Job That cunning display that made Londoners sob Now comes the real Tour de Force Tricky and wicked, of course My earlier crimes were fine for their times But now that I'm at it again An even grimmer plot has been simmering In my great criminal brain Thugs: Even meaner? You mean it? Worse than the widows and orphans you drowned? You're the best of the worst around Oh, Ratigan Oh, Ratigan The rest fall behind To Ratigan To Ratigan The world's greatest criminal mind Ratigan: "Thank you, Thank you. But it hasn't all been champagne and caviar. I've had my share of adversity, thanks to that miserable second-rate detective, Basil of Baker Street! " boos Ratigan: "For years, that insufferable pipsqueak has interfered with my plans. I haven't had a moment's peace of mind." Thugs: "Aww" cries Ratigan: "But, all that's in the past! This time, nothing, not even Basil, can stand in my way! All will bow before me!" Thugs: Oh, Ratigan Oh, Ratigan You're tops and that's that To Ratigan To Ratigan Bartholomew: To Ratigan, the world's greatest rat Ratigan: "What was that?" hiccups. "What did you call me?" is about to repeat what he said when he's interrupted by a thug. 1: "Oh, oh, he didn't mean it, Professor." 2: "I-it was just a slip of the tongue." Ratigan: "I am NOT A RAT!" 1: "'Course you're not. You're a mouse!" 3: "Yeah, that's right. Right! A mouse." 2: "Yeah, a big mouse!" Ratigan: "SILENCE!" throws Bartholomew out. "Oh, my dear Bartholomew, I'm afraid that you've gone and upset me. You know what happens when someone upsets me." pulls out a bell. The thugs gasps. He rings it. Felicia approaches the unknowing Bartholomew. Bartholomew: Oh, Ratigan Oh, Ratigan You're the tops and that's that (Oh dear.) To Ratigan To Ratigan To Ratigan, the world's greatest - The Thugs have a moment of silence. Felicia: Meow. Ratigan: "Oh, Felicia, my precious, my baby. Did Daddy's little honey bun enjoy her tasty __?" Felicia: Urp. Ratigan: "I trust there will be no further interruptions? And now, as you were singing?" Thugs are hesitant... until Ratigan pulls out the bell. The Thugs gasp. Thugs: Even louder We'll shout it! No one can doubt what we know you can do You're more evil than even you Oh, Ratigan Oh, Ratigan You're one of a kind To Ratigan To Ratigan The world's greatest criminal mind Trivia *Originally, the song was longer and featured a verse about the Tower Bridge Job. In the verse, Ratigan described how he "picked off" his partners in crimes one-by-one. However, the verse was removed, more than likely because it was too violent for a children's film; the full version is featured on "The Great Mouse Detective" storybook tape. Vincent Price did not perform it though, another voice actor was called in to record it. **One of the Thugs in the scene resembles Bill the Lizard from "Alice in Wonderland" and has been dubbed so by the fans. Category:Songs